Thursday, April 14, 2005

A Filipino Applies for a Job at Wal-Mart.

An office manager at Wal-Mart was given the task of hiring an
individual to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of
resumes he found four people who were equally qualified. .. An
American, a Russian, an Australian and a Filipino.

He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their
answer would determine which of them would get the job. The day came
and as the four sat around the conference room table the interviewer
"What is the fastest thing you know of?"

Acknowledging Dave, the American on his right, the man replied, " A
THOUGHT". It just pops into your head. There's no warning that it's on
the way; it's just there. A thought is the fastest thing I know of.
"That's very good!" replied the interviewer.

"And now you sir?" he asked Vladimir, the Russian. "Hmm.... let me see.
A blink! It comes and goes and you don't know that it ever happened. A
BLINK is the fastest thing I know of. "Excellent!" said the
interviewer. "The blink of an eye, that's a very popular cliché for

He then turned to George, the Australian who was contemplating his
reply. "Well, out at my dad's ranch, you step out of the house and on
the wall there's a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out
across the pasture the light in the barn comes on. Yep, TURNING ON A
LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of." The interviewer was very
impressed with the third answer and thought he had found his man. "It's
hard to beat the speed of light" he said.

Turning to Eleuterio, the Filipino, the fourth and final man, the
interviewer posed the same question. Eleuterio replied, "Apter herring
da 3 frevyos ansers sirrr, et's obyus to me dat the fastest thang known
is Diarrhea."WHAT!?" said the interviewer, stunned by the response. "O
I can expleyn serrr ." said Eleuterio . " YOU SEE SERR, DA other day I
wasn't Peeeling so good and I run soo fast to the CR or bathroom, But,
before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, ay 'tang ina, I
already had a big tae, ka-ka or poo-poo in my pants. Eleuterio is now
the new "Greeter" at Wal-Mart.